So it’s friday the 13’th again… Here’s a few tips on how to survive the monsters and killers and other things that wish to hack you to pieces.

1. Don’t run upstairs when the killer is chasing you, what are you planning to do when you are on the roof? Rather run on flatland… the psycho killers are always walking so you should be able to outrun it…

1b. The cellar is not a good idea either… for the same reason.

2. Don’t shower, when you are in the shower the psycho killer will come… just look at a zillion horror movies and you’ll understand… If you smell like a badger and absolutely got to shower, lock the door…

3. Don’t walk alone on dark roads, that is like telling the werewolves and other unpleasant things here I am come and kill me…

4. Don’t go to parties, even though it’s less risky to be in a crowd, a crowd of drunk teenagers use to get brutally murdered one by one until only one remains, and chances are that’s not you…

I think the best you can do is to be with one good friend that you are pretty sure is not a werewolf or a vampire and stay indoors and play monopoly or something equally boring until it’s one minute past 12, Saturday the 14’th… if you made it that far you’re safe until Friday the 13’th of November…. that’s when they come back… and you have to start all over again…

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